The Tragedy of the Creepy Phone Stalker Guy

The phone rings.

“Dijkstra Agency, this is Natalie.”

“Hi, can I speak to Sandra Dijkstra?”

“Can I ask who’s calling please?”

“Uh – can I speak to Sandra?”

Uh oh. I know who this is. It’s CREEPY PHONE STALKER.

“I’m sorry, I need to know who this is; is she expecting your call?”

“Yes, she knows who I am. I submitted a manuscript to her I need to talk about.”

Oh dear lord.

“Well, I’m sorry to say that she isn’t in the office right now-”

“When will she be back?”

“Ah – you know, she’s actually out for the rest of the week.”

“Oh. Well, is there a time I can call when she’ll be in the office?”

“You know, I really can’t say…she works from her home office a lot as well...”

“Ok, but you don’t understand. I need to speak with SANDRA DIJKSTRA. She has my manuscript.”

“You know, I can put you through to Sandy’s assistant; she reads everything alongside Sandy and I’m sure-”

“No, I need to speak with Sandra. It’s very important.”

“I’m sorry…she’s just not in the office today.”

“Ok, look, I’ll call back.”

Great.


Two days later. Phone at Sandy’s assistant’s desk rings. “Dijkstra Agency this is Elise.”

Pause. She starts to pick up her pen to take notes.

“I’m sorry, can I ask who’s calling?”

Pen is put down. She sits back in her chair.

“I’m sorry, Sandy isn’t in the office today. But I’d be happy to talk to you about your manuscript….uh huh. I understand. Unfortunately, Sandy just can’t take your call…no, she’s…yes, I understand…ok.”

She hangs up.

“He’s going to call back, isn’t he?” I ask.

She sighs. “Every few months.”

Eventually, we learned his name was Michael. It took several calls to get this information. Finally, he spoke to Elise about his manuscript. Michael is currently undergoing bankruptcy, and is afraid the bank will take his manuscript. It is urgent he speaks with Sandra Dijkstra, so that she will represent him, so he can retain the rights to his manuscript.

Michael still calls to this day. He never gets to speak to Sandra Dijkstra.

The Beginning

Once upon a time, there was a little writer by the name of Natalie Fischer. Natalie dreamed of being an author. 200 rejections and a consensus of "great writing, needs plot" later, she landed an internship with the Sandra Dijkstra Literary Agency -- and has been happily immersing herself in the adventures of agent land ever since.

So stay tuned. There's no telling what's next -- or what adventures are to come!